Last year I was very upset after my jury. I had worked all year towards these pieces and excerpts. But, for the final test I messed up a lot. The weekend before I was in an honor band and we played so much that I had blood blisters in my mouth from my braces and my lips were swollen. My jury was that Monday and I messed up a lot and could barely play. I was very upset because I had worked so hard for this final moment and to work so hard and come up short was devastating. 

 

The patterns of joy article talks a lot about how one's internal compass, and that they're bodies react to how they perceive the situation; rather than how it actually is.This relates to my experience as it is not the piece the I hate it is the feeling or experience I connect with it. I had to play a piece in my first symphonic concert. I was very exposed in the piece and I was playing first on it. I say that I hate this piece, but really it's not the piece that I hate. It just exposes how I need to be better at staying in time, not cracking and being more confident in my playing. 

​

Hubert is always tense when he plays second trumpet in the orchestra. He wants to relax more even though in order to match the first trumpet he has to play flat.

​

I relate to this scenario the most. Especially with my previous experience. I was very tense when I had to play 1st Horn. And the other horns in the piece were depending on me to keep them in time more than the conductor. This made me even more nervous.